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August 03, 2006
Hatred
It's not so bad, hatred.
Not beautiful, perhaps, but compact.
What else is to be done with anger, when anger has run it's course?
Hatred, anger, rage. You have to choose one. PBs tend to choose rage -- this is the ultimate result of trying not choosing, of trying to stay beautiful and unmarred. Leave it inchoate, unacknowleged, simmering, unstable, explosive. What a bad decision. Rage is my least favorite of the three.
Anger is also difficult. It churns. It demands activity. It keeps you awake. Good, as long as there is something useful to be done. Keep the fires burning -- won't it consume you, eventually?
That is why I like hatred. Coiled tight, factual, like DNA inside the nucleus. Everything is there, dormant, ready to spool out and activate. But easy to carry, light in the gut -- not eating away, like they say.
Cool and smooth, like a worn pebble -- I have an enemy.
Maybe if you had too many enemies, you could become miserable, a gut full of rocks; but chosen carefully, having an enemy is no failing.
Posted by Sam at August 3, 2006 08:38 AM