New Cities/New Soviets

March 09, 2004

OK, vanity again

I have to admit to feeling little burnt
for a moment
by Stephen Fry calling
Americans self-involved,

(liking him, as I do; and not yet reading through the journalistic cut-and-paste job in effect)

speaking
As someone who has known lonliness
and therefore a certain degree
of involvement with myself


you know?
Talking in the first person,
I have to admit to that.


but it ain't that simple joe


-----------

it's really important
to keep one thing
crystal
fucking
clear:
Vanity is not the same as narcissism.


Narcissism is simple self-centeredness.
("write what you know, right?" says mol)
Vanity is systematic detachment
from other people.

they operate on entirely different frequencies,
even when combined in a single perp

-----------

A narcissist may care a great deal
about the people connected to him
or
the events that occur around her

There is a trap there,
but there is
an exit


Vanity pulls away from that border.
pulls away from other people.
that is its operation, that is its function


A narcissist may try to
pull you in, even
incorporate you.

But you are still a there for them!
still something that must be
contended with, someone else
who holds a key
to their desire
EVEN IF THAT DESIRE IS ONLY FOR YOUR PRAISE.


(So Steve, when you knock people
for eating pap
did you ever think that
a nation of invalids
might need
to work up to solid food?

There is work to be done --
but people will endure an awful lot of toil
for a little praise.)

VANITY, ON THE OTHER HAND,
ESCHEWS THE ENTIRE "OTHER PEOPLE" DEAL ALTOGETHER
any mutal implication

ANY
speaking of the two of you
in the same breath

is impossible and contraindicated
is
too horrible to be confronted.
"that's a big negatory --
These are not elements to be juxtaposed."


You see the difference?


We are self-centered
by default
naturally,
if we don't pull each other
up out of it, out of that
lonely mire of selfhood.

This is a social work,
not a personal characteristic.


Vanity, onna other hand, don't want all that --

cures the dirty lowness
that is a life alone
by rejecting life altogether!

"right quick sir
I got your
final solution right here."

This is the choice at current:
muck-filled swamp,
or sterile orb.


by hook and crook I would rather live

***and Don't fool yourself
there is no way back to Eden
the original knowledge
is all used up.
forward is the way.

There cannot be:
no life here
and life elsewhere

velocity is no savior
if there is no starting point

Life is mutual apprehension
of itself and something else.
here relating to
there

"this is the space age we are here to go"

but

our steps are on this earth
and start

in our own shoes

Posted by Sam at March 9, 2004 03:17 AM

beautiful distinction fella



vanity knoweth not
his name
so can not be called
to accounts

one narc
seeth but himself
till with an other
he joins mirrors

ecce metro

keep pluggin pard

Posted by: meat me at March 9, 2004 03:48 PM

thanks, meat

I also wanted to clarify:
I remember you expressing
some doubt about the vanity/"in vain"
identity I used in zeropride.

Here's an example:
During cooking school it happened
that I called a teacher "fat,"
thinking that I could have that word
mean anything I wanted it to, namely
not perjoratively.

It was vanity to think that
I myself could have my own language,

and in vain that I tried to use
this langauge to communicate.


capiche?

Posted by: sam at March 10, 2004 09:36 AM

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