this guy pak and his DPRK THING'S FOR REAL i've emailed him back and forth twice at moneyeye/pakman/@dotmail . com he sent me this book he can't get pubbed a couple excerpts follow : chapter 13 the heart of the matter it was one of those nondescript mid manhattan high rises the sort woody allen and sally sawdust dart in and out of when their cheating on mutual friends. the same glass fronted lobby same dim sour lighting same podium style desk with the usual one of a kind self inventions stting behind it reading or dozing or picking at the brim of his security cap. this paticular edition a fat pink one as i remember a fat pink one with a meat ball sub waiting wanting to get back to the next mouth full sped thru his various whatnots on phone and buzzer and five minutes into the process I’m on the 43rd floor looking for door B which appears after a sharp turn past an over dressed door A down the end of a short corridor. --------------------------------------------------------------- my bell ring led to the swift appearence of “just another gook in black” as my uncle likes to call his sober clad countrymen . this one on opening up looks like he could be my cousin Brian from Encino that is if my cousin Brian could rip the limbs off a bear. “ good evening mr pak” he ‘d seen my picture some where evidently. “ general Noh is waiting for you” and he was, in a big chair, smoking a long filtered cigarrette and gleeming with late nite cheer. So this was the terrible general Noh Dae Jo or so I say to myself anyways frail the guy looks frail. frail and glassy “ welcome sir welcome” he roises and comes at me shaking my hand quickly lightly sharply. “ please take a chair.... sorry so spartan” he wasnt kidding no Bond eye feast here coming up i’m hoping for maybe a funk struck playboy pad try vip room at the bus terminal . the General immediately entertained me with a little mockery. waving his left arm around like a broker . “ digs like this are the secret charm of my line of work... we like to call them surveillance rooms.... sounds high tech doesn’t it .... they aren’t....... .care for a cigarette? mr pak a scotch and soda...... a bag of pop corn oh oh ofcourse not forgive me... this is america isn’t it .... your personal goals ah ..... i suspect ... call for a life laced up with ah endless health and vigor..... the american dream ahh .... hardly comes without sacrifices does it mr pak... ..... i must admit to you mr pak .... i myself am a very weak willed fellow” now he was waving his arm around to make his smoke streams get away from the front of his face. “ three packs a day ....... and ah butts are only a small part so many addictions ” saying this he laughed at himself and frowned mildly at the cigarette burning in his hand . “ you bitch” he scolds and then throwing back his head slowly he drew off a long hit “ take that ” what a production . i suspect if you were around him yourself like i was for any decent interval at all you couldn’t help getting uncomfortible in one way or other the details of this mans smoking for one example ridiculous -- no better to call it senseless -- like the old fashion way he had of holding his smoke high up on his finger tips with the palm of his hand underneath. and then steering it around him as he spoke like he was playing with a toy airplane or a boat in a tub what could he be thinking Gestapo interrogator perhaps. but he was far too loose too swaggerless too flexible to play that hollywood staple at least not when, like now ,he was out of uniform in a plum shaded liberace lounging jacket and most likely drunk. in fact as i watched him redrape himself back over his chair I thought what he’d really pass for right about then was a first rate carnival snake you know drugged to gentleness fangs retracted a cobra perhaps just now settling back into his basket maybe theres the toot of a hypnotic flute in there . to say the least his ease of purpose was not mine . only god knows why after all wasn’t this show time but like a jackass i was struggling with the tools of my craft and making a fools jumble of it trying to organize my notes and switch on my recorder at the same time he gazed at me contentedly, puffing away slowly and spiralling the smoke out a vent he’d fashion periodically at the side of his mouth . clearly just any old uneasy silence couldn’t force him to fill it with chatter. “ ummhh” i said eventually while still shuffling “ lets see” stuff all slid off my lap . after a fast (impatient maybe) show of teeth Noh decided to unhook me by slinging some apple sauce. “ my a lot of notes looks to me like you’ve got the basis for a whole raft of questions there.... and audio equipment too.” he started gesturing at my tape recorder slowly clicking away on the floor next to me. “ well actually...I......I..”fumbling my retrieved papers “ i i could start several different ways ....” “ ah perhaps it would go faster if i just pushed off into the thick of it. what do you think?... perhaps if i narrate it eh...... from the begining .. hows that strike you ? ” he sparkled his eyes at me a moment was my head nodding yes? “ ah fine.... fine ..... i’ll just dive on through’ but then he halted as i scrambled to regulate my recorder. “ ah please mr pak .... no tapings please other peoples tapings have a predictable habit of biting you right in the can later ....we are recording every thing anyway ... superb system ..could hear a tick fart on it ... we’ll give you a copy ... maybe you can take some written notes though anyway........ helps the brain sometimes cut thru all my bull ...... what do you think ?” i assured him i always took notes. “ ah a belt and suspenders type .....good ....good so... lets see... where should i begin... ah yes ....” and he proceeded.over the next three and a half hours to spool out his story the whole story or at least his version of the whole story and here it is just as he told it in his exact words as recorded on tape by his own system let me preface this with a little tip dont lapse during the many massively selfindulgent digressions your going to find in this all i can say is remember 1 hes foxy he knows way way more then he can staightly tell 2. some of his best nuggets are buried under a platoon of nonsense 3. the on rush of the story is more variable in its rate of progress then the kimpo river stay with it over and over you get these seemingly endless sluggish meanders that in a phrase turn to plunging ravines headed arrow straight for the bulls eye watch out 4. then god there’s the damn wordage this piece of transcription reads I guarantee as bizarrely as anything you or I ever have read or ever will read there ive said it . i can live with it yes he really talks like that you’ll hit your limit of texas john connolly stories and nights among the toe whores of copenhagen don’t drop out please this confection of his this red shaggy dog tale contains the emblems of deep truth good folks the story’s in there maybe hes made it out of corn and lightning but its in there I could have chopped gouged replaced and repatched but to me the rules were clear scattered among everything else in this garbage can of verbiage i found unmistakeable instructions decoded they all say one thing “ leave this be” like the words of Goethe’s Mephisto himself “ nothing other not more not less not above not below nothing other contains the spell ” ------------------------------------------------ the recording itself arrived the next day at my office by hand delivery there was a note attached to it a typed note “hears the upshot of our interview mr pak make of it what you can dont worry it doesnt self desolve take as much time with it as your editor will allow .” and hand written at the bottom in tiny cunic letters another note “ god have i been long winded here!!!! sorry, you see its inevitable. It comes from never telling the same story twice sincerely dae jo ” ----------------------------------------------- mr kurtz speaks for himself “ well ah lets see.... perhaps a little back ground... its 1971 and maybe you ‘re reading about the ex governor of texas ... the one who took a slug in 63... aimed at mattress jack all americas go go president ...... yes you remember he took a slug that day too one hell of a slug flew right thru the intended and in and out of the governor in less time then it takes a toad to belch howdy yes yes yes mr john q connolly maybe we make him the first hero of our story he was part of that day in dallas that sun drenched day in dallas right there in the middle of all that that gleaming black steel all that hebephrenic waving all that damn baring of brilliant public teeth right smack dab in the midst of it all just like he’d figured then suddenly out of the thin texas blue out of a depository of pedagocical quakery came a history lesson an unbidden history lesson barked three times and blood bone and brains sprang from the nations executive head that aaahh till that moment nothing but glamour drenched head aaahh yess that day in dallas in the winking texas sun in an open shining detroit limmo one vigor and grace tormented soul was offered up to the gods of social progress offered up in sacrafice in a Lincoln of death a sublime moment don’t you agree mr pak at any rate the texas governor was hit in Dallas too . right along with JFK and so now we’ve grabbed up the governor lets drag him forward 8 years .... to ah 1971 you’re reading in the washington post that this ex texas democrat this former footnote this one liner on the world stage this big hat texan just around long enough to take one magic slug just there for his entry and exit wounds oh and his wife’s marvelous instincts throwing her vital curvacious body over his giving him the shield of devotion denigned the president in the seat behind him connoly left her i believe not long after for a strawberry blonde from atlanta well back here in washington 71 .... you see the photo in the paper hes the hard case in the brooks brothers suit if your decent your saying “dang is that him again” and it is ... pea eyed and dry faced looking ever so much like he’s coming to arrest some one .... tin star nasty that look that thin curl of the lip....... especially the eyes the eyes always a simple two step from hanging a helpless victim well ah here he is like jaws .... hes .....back and christ almighty hes Dick Nixons lovebird ..... hes running uncles friggin treasury... walking tall ten gallon tall up there in the district of columbia running sweet deals out the back of the money show for who ... for who else the wall street to cactus creek energy gang ... and assorted others ofcourse .. hes not just about drillers and pipers and such . there are others he likes to take orders for any one really with a fat enough roll or an unbrakeable government hardon whatever so long as they got a grateful turn of mind come campaign season now among them favorites perhaps first among them .... no certainly first among them are the big Manhattan bankers .. everyone listens to them boys ... who doesn’t need real slap down long green ... yep take it........ you got a deal we all need some of that tenderable stuff now and again and ah they got it they got the green the big green they dont just got it they can print it right ..... make it appear from nothing. they push a button and fomc its in their accounts but seems theres a problem though ...and ah seems a very good size ah .... problem.... the post war global payment system has ah developed a wicked tit twist ....a bull calf cramp in its get along .... a fence pole up its beehind ... worse maybe maybe much worse ...we cant wait and see they say ...we ah need action now as always theres serious coin down on the table ....right got to face whos out there on the dance floor or some twit ‘ll back shoot ya well ah these bankers are patriots after all ... more then anything red white and blue patriots.. red white and blue dollar patriots to be exact and naturally if the world ah markets are ready to do something larger then the usual rippling .... well ,,, naturally these boys look to the dollar’s welfare first now still then in everyones mind the dollar’s still almighty ofcourse at least in every ignorant outsiders mind the dollars still the worlds modern atlas still the broad shoulders holding up world prosperity or is it lets hope the fuck so or...... remember mr pak the commercial twenty years ago or more with that large black scat singing lady is it real or is it memorex ? the bank boys wanted the watching world to know the answer is its real baby the dollar is real all too real here mr pak we must drop back again ... we are receeding further from our story ah ..... what a pleasure to act as if there is no need for timing “ no time for brevity here comrades” old kim loved that phrase .... no sir there’s never been a time limit to the truth just time without end where roll is never called “so glorious ...... so truely stately ..... pace the tale’s telling to the fashion of angels ” that ah mr pak is allegedly rod serling’s last words let me drop us back further past dallas 63 way back to 1944 its war in europe a guy the likes of Hitler can still put on a clean pair of pants every day despite tons of bombs and massing russian rapists on the eastern borders the germans fight on ....but in the brisk clear autumn rustle back state side at the feet of mt washington the annual falling leaf festival is ah painting the earth with little red and yellow miracles a gusty fluttering diffidence welcome to bretton woods new hampshire mr pak come inside the storied old resort hotel where things are waxing very big picture indeed...ah post war big picture.... you know the gig its our man keynes and that seriously over rated guy .... the alleged kremlin submarine the absurdly self serious immigrants boy the one hiding behind an old yankee sounding name yes harry dexter white yes he and keynes are flinging together a world money system up there in the white mountains just the two of them as far as posterity cares and the linchpin they craft ..... a dollar forever tied to gold.. 35 dollars tied to one ounce of gold till kingdom come just one ounce just 35 dollars and for all time or at least as keynes told a promising young reporter in argyle socks “ until something better comes along ” well up ahead in 71 something worse came along instead it took its time getting there ofcourse for more then twenty years the dollar ruled while still tied ....tied ....tied just like the white-keynes plan called for at 35 to an ounce regular as a metranome tick tock like life exchanges back and forth with death or something no thats ridiculous whats the match up in that 35 dollars is life and one ounce of gold death thats William Jennings Bryan stuff scratch the analogy cross of gold my foot I instruct you mr pak to expunge that unfortunate figure from memory no to be brief the dollar and gold 35 to one thats it it was a tie without precedent or parallel a tie made in wall street heaven and for 10 years it worked like a dream beyond the orbit of pluto it worked this system .. restoring whole nations and freeing others Europe it raised from its own rubble Japan from someone elses radioactive spanking propelled by its zing retooled democracies old and new straight armed our man Stalin’s stooges time and again the system sustained a mighty pool of pluralism a moat of freedom across the waist of europe and around the skirt of asia then after taking a refreshing ike type snooze while the old mole tunneled mostly unseen its time for Camelot and its still going fine well almost fine ..... fine enough for the asshole innocent taxpayers anyway but but but radio listeners be on guard in the control towers of the globe the phrase “ dollar capital controls” is out and about like the skunk of avalon but our captain brave young captain still says sail on sail on and it remains the wisdom of wall street that any house rigged odds no matter how low were better then no rig at all trouble is about this same time jfk not satisfied with outer space alone starts looking over seas for another one of his wild frontiers to tame and ride and wouldn’t you know right about then is also just when a lot less then fully grateful and now some what post colonial world starts finding itself wanting less from uncle fester’s arsenal of profits and more from itself and for itself and so wow be tied theres uncle poor uncle wanting ever and ever more more more more from this very same freshly minted deimperialized globe the grim and inevitable brake down is now on view at least to the tower topping annointed its so basic its positively structural its genetic in fact there it is and there it was right from jump street waiting for a cue .... see at the dawn of the american century 1946 uncle got this double dose of the greed need a hogs appetite a don’t settle for no robins breakfast so his cap set on big progress uncle wall street plans to build over or pump out or buy up just about everything worth the building over pumping out or buying up there is in this godless world the whole man jack wide godless world and where as now that same said world is back on its toes and throwing a few jabs of its own well cowhands we got ourselves a pair of signifigantly conflicted bidness plans it now would seem the whole world only wants from uncle what uncle does better then anyone else well uncle god bless him by 62 uncle doesn’t make all that much better stuff anymore outside of weapons ..... action movies and ah computers .... so whos happy selling the national treasures to uncle blue for war wampum a snatch look at rachel’s titoons and the inevitable flood of US treasury solid state IOU’S there are just so many jet fighters and parascopes ya need on a sunday picnic right ... lifes more then sabres and cyphers and as to the IOU’s well try them on a bagette sometime so bingo the world wants more...and from elsewhere so big boy blue gets the line “start giving us the difference in gold ” not all of it mind you “heres your dollars MR SAM we got them selling you the american dream the color tvs the decent perfume the cheap dress shirts the xmas toys now you give us back say 10% in gold and bro the deals between us are cool they’ll l ... ah keep on flowing “ and uncle we’ll happily take the rest of the difference as we have for a few years now in treasury bonds...... do the right thing with your thing skipper and we promise the world stays up for sale just slip us some yeller metal and presto the dollar sale tags go back on our vitals just a modest 20% got to be in gold no more thats the limit absolutly not an ounce more oh heck did i say 20% sorry i meant ah 30% i know i know if it was just a case of me well treasuries hell i love them i love treasuries myself got that interest thing on them but i got to think of the widows and orphans back home jeepers you know ..... i got to think of them too its the little people Sam ... they got night dreams bad ones about the old days they see shovels full of government tender worthless tender ...... shovel fullsSam ...and they’re not enough to buy a ham sandwitch even not one ham sandwitch and these were the legal tenders Sam every one of them the issues of mighty governments Sam governments that said they’d last a thousand years gone in one or two olympic cycles governments without sunsets governments with only only rising tides they’ve seen hard times these little parentless childless people theyve seen the best go mad and the rest pay triple so we got to have the difference in gold daddy gold ” now what does this spell... if your 100% USDA ..... well it spells drain preciuos drain thats what it spells thats right major general gold drain fort knox going dry type gold drain got to do something here children right the rig is about up by the way some say that fedhead Burns planned to eased up the credit to reelect Nixon and the consequent import splurge couldnt be accomadated so they busted up the world monetary system to reelect the man from san clemente and we all got watergate and beyond in 71 Burns the fedhead puffed kittens out his pipe alright but a Nixon re elect forget about it strictly a bypass burns was a puffing cause the wall st bullies are twitchy and they’re divided over the drain skein Nixon himself cant get into such high gear finance after all hes just a respectable cloth coat pol goosing the money supply could help reelect him in 72 Ike’s tight ass money policy may have done him in 60 but to believe the re election of that five o’clock shaddow brought down the dollar gold system what moonshine we make sometimes guess what small potatoes like Nixon and Connolly take orders on stuff like this they dont give them but thank the sabine river... for producing big hat no cattle braggarts cause here comes one named Connolly what do they say down his way one riot one ranger Connolly can do and does do take orders that is unless he wants another slug in him take the bows and keep yapping cowpoke so the deed was done our story commences right here when big john cut the keynes-white knot yes our story and most others can start best right here with this Simple Simon of the tumble weeds this sage brush Alexander cutting lady dollar outta that dang precious yeller metal hog tie she got roped into by whats their names you know the brit fag with the ballerina beard and that there smudge pot commie of ours yahoo shes free finally free to spread em and spread em wide west texas gusher wide yes sir mr president i cut those bindin’s and uncles outta the gold rush bizness for keeps and from what I can tell nixon just said “what a man” so from approximately that day forth the dollar was free to swim right along with the rest of the heffers but but but here comes a wonderous sudden upshot enter stage left sheik opec and rocky racoon --------------------------------------------- EVER SEE THE MOVIE THE FORMULA MR PAK brando the immortal brando plays an oil tycoon at one point he says” what about opec you ask what about opec we are opec “ well thats poetic license but the heart is true opec was a creature of big energy they herded the snakes into one organization so they could control them better like many creatures it lost its sense of gratitude almost biblical are you a christian mr pak i am thanks to a scotish missionary who liked chess i was oh 9 or so living in canton my father was a jap diplomats toady the scot taught me chess and calvinism yup he taught me predestination preterition and the judgement day right along with the roy lopez openning the keng family now not long after I was brought ah ..in.. to ah run things I get introduced to the most extraordinary family of ah ..... geniuses its ah .... ever been my honor and pleasure to commune with the keng family the amazing kengs I’d heard of them ofcourse who hadn’t among the inner ah thousand they were legendary they were nothing less then the Bernoulli’s the Cassinis of the DPRK given the secret nature of all our work theirmathematical brake throughs were never revealed to anyone outside the secured zone but ah ... looked at objectively their work was like ah .... the work of those renowned ah... renaissance calculators who kept their formulas a secret likethe formula to the cubic only these were not family secrets they were state secrets national secrets there were 5 of them active at the time two generations worth a pair of twin brothers and their three oldest children two girls and a boy yes girls ah....we’ll get to them ah ..in a moment first let me explain old Kim’s late in life love affair with mathematics it started when he turned 60 not that he had any gift for it but he would work very hard to understand it and his knowledge after a few years was not bad he had his quirky views ofcourse like he had about everything my favorite was his near perfect hatred of non producible real numbers the simple idea you could crack open a square natural number and get two endless reals made him think of ghosts and demons but he liked them they were trapable so to speak inside a natural whole and pi and e and the other producible transcendentals he loved he used to say he would pay handsomely if some one found another really good one like the one that lies between the log and the harmonic series but the random reals unproducible inseparable I think they actually scared him “ the continuum all at once and then all again ” he often said to us “ we must be brave before the continuum face it down .......” then he’d say “ fuck no who needs it anyway ” and bray like a donkey his real deep love was for complex integers they appealed to his sense of what he called “certainty within surprise” when in his last 10 years his mind turned to market economics he always hoped we’d come up with a model for economic markets that required complex numbers “ still don’t need them eh ” he’d say nonetheless the math others brought to the issues excited him greatly ofcourse given his prejudices he despised analytic results “ they’re all based on continuum tricks ” he’d say “ they make all cows black or white or whatever the hell else puts you to sleep ” “ market economics is elementary my dear watson ” he used to say to us “so lets stick to integers ” if some pompous bourgeois giant tried to combine analytics with utility concepts the results always provoked a kind of scoffing fury in him Samuelson’s Foundations his 47 classic was to old KIM “ the work of a foxy hydro engineer no more no less water and exchange values don’t mix ” “ utility is like ether what nonsense ” “ preferences hardly behave like a glass of orange juice ” he was fond of von Neuman and frank Ramsey even though Ramsey used some analytic short hand “ no problem I forgive him he chased unavailable women too “ integer programming came naturally to him “ I like step functions and things with sharp facets flat faces and edges that are straight an briefly abrupt I’m Chinky that way its no wonder is it that I hate differential geometry ” but stuff like multi node networks immediately seemed “ inevitable ” to him when the research people brought their ideas and solutions before him and they fit his warps well then ofcourse his mind was wide open so when the first of the keng market simulation results were brought to him by the planning board and he saw they were matrix systems and involved a great deal of parallelism and each move was “ as discrete as a blow to the throat ” he went wild with fascination thanks to the kengs after that we could do no wrong what they had done was work out a feasible simulation for security markets whether bond or stock or tulips or land for thart matter didn’t change much the generality and simplicity were startling to any one who had stared at these things like I had for years and not even remotely gathered they could actually be so accurately simulated with a math model especially ones so similar to the ones used to solve the four color problem more then anything else their quick closure theorem held the key to the rest remember these aren’t some silly evolutionary algorithims they found out the variations in possible market responses after initially expanding rapidly in complexity as you’d expect as you added traders and trade items to every ones surprise counter intutively complexity growth dropped off dramatically like the deceleration as you approach the upper arm of the log function for example after the the thousandth player level is reached in a 100 item game the added accuracy gained by adding players was negligible even if the simulated market had ten million traders or 10 trillion even so we got 1000 Apple C ‘s on the jap after markets and we were off to the races the real market could have millions of potential players and not generate significant differences from our simple little thousand unit model provided you had time series long enough of the real markets aggregate behavior to feed in even very crude underlying learning algorithms could be programmed into a few PC’s and quickly start to evolve towards a remarkable degree of precision it took us two years to get a network of autotraders that handled new data like the real markets handled the same data like the real traders reacted to their own developments and to any serious fundamental underling developments like trade news or budget news or land values etc. we could tip it on end and run nation isolations to study invariance’s and risk ranges then the kengs came up with a bubble detection algorithm we soon found bubble watches paid off the bigger the bubble the safer the counter play all we needed was a way to pop themPosted by pinky at July 11, 2003 10:28 AM
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