House of Paine

fired by a robot

  I’ve been fired
 have you 

it burns a little 

but there’s worse 

I’ve been kicked out of school
too 


and rejected by harvard college 

and crashed a 5 generation family biz

and you know I’m a convicted fraudulator 

only got cancer 
and 
prison left 

less I die in a car accident 



======================


my daughter
mol tse toon 
 sez 
i really oughta 
 see if I can do 
 a stretch
 in the state pen 

 in”loo”of 
the 150 k 
unpaid 
balance 
owed 
the commonwealth
by 
 Paine’s  
 in untransfered 
 sales tax
receipts 

“ it's criminal dad
even if 
ya didn’t
 know
what the fuck 
you were doing ”
“ that's no excuse 
it's objectively theft
Daddio 
theft 
 of state property”
 
obviously 
I  can’t pay off 
 fast enough 

so she has a point 

 I balk 
though
 at prison 

 “ ah come on
 what's
  IT GONNA BE 
  a couple three years 

we’re talkin 
 soft hamper time
 here
not Sing Sing 

 christ pops
  you could do that 
in one pair of shorts ”
-----------------------------------------------------------
 back on track :

yezzzzz

  I ‘VE BEEN FIRED 
 and I’ve been hired

its better to be hired 

and here's my post 
==============
 on ONE 
OF THE  PRIME TIME BOOBNET’s 
these days
 they got
A REALITY  show 
where
 old Donny Trump
gets to say 

“ YOUR FIRED ! ”
 and mean it 
 or
 mean it
  at least
 as much as
 anything
 on the tube
 is meant 

sure as death itself
this type
of  shit happens
at the end 
of every episode 

every week 
another  
drop  of the axe 

and the Pub's
lappin it up like cream 
==================
my question to you 
why does it feel 
so fucking  good 
to see and 
 hear that ?

why does the lash 
apon another back 
sting so sweet 

 millions taste it
 just like me
and 
crave more

the show’s
 making
 big big  bones
==============

and this
 is all goin down 
while the donald’s 
real “empire”
is in the value pit

but that's another story....

 
there he is 
 a hit on the airwaves 

 viewers
 regular hooked viewers 
are there
 tongies out
dicks hard 
cracks wet 
each week

and why?

cause 
there comes that moment 
when 
with his  elbow propped
 on the board room table 
his fine american  head
 in patented 
 Donald-side cock
the boy-man 
suddenly 
flashes
 A FRENCH CUFFED 
forearm
out 
and 
snaps
“ you’re fired ”
and with that 
zings down
 the latest  bullshitter
====================
top guy wet work
 no
leave it to the
HRdepartments
dykes 
no 
 side man type
“ sorry pal”
nope 
its straight 
aging golden boy
CEO
 doin his own 
knifing
===================
MASTER TRUMP
 judge jury executioner

and all
 under one magical hairdo

not a show down
but a gun down

a wack 
by a guy 
who’s
 still goin
 for  the look
that went out
about the same time 
 the surf 
took away
 dennis wilson 


---------------------------------

 what do we  have here
 
 this  nation 
that beat the soviets
simply by sticking 
to liberty 

simply by
sticking
to its roots
 to the 
 plural power points
and    flexibility
only availible 
when there are 
“muchly”
private pots 
in and at  play 


“ we croaked
 the stalin system
with our 
  20,000 stalin
system ”
    paul samuelson

each of our autocratic
 pipsqueaks 
doing their
 own 
 damn thing 
not just one 
big crusty  saber tooth 

  20 thousand foxes 
  


the 
shining soviet
 on the hill 
what a fuckin joke 


 gine uz 
not one but 
20,000 maos

 little
 medium 
big 
and super big  Maos 

after all maybe 
it   takes a stalin 
to check a stalin 
 
 
I can see it all
 now 
the stalin clones 
 all taking  
their respective
 straight line  assignments
and twisting them 
 around  like
warm  pretzel dough 

do it our way
the liberty private
 horde against horde way 
 
 no need for gulags

only unemployment lines

cause one stalin
 thwarts another
no one's king of the hill long
fuck besides we don’t just got one hill
we got thousands of hills
worth climbin’
 
“ yep 
for every stalin
twistin it one way 
theres another stalin
 twisting
the pretzel
 right back in his face ”

so back
and forth it goes 
 twist left twist right
the result 
 progress 
real progress
plus 
silk sheets 
in heaven
for the losers 
----------------------------------------------------------
  sorry about that 
a stray wave a sarcasm
overcame me


to get 
back on  path 

  I’ve fired people
 a lot more times
then I myself
 have been fired

A HELL OF A LOT MORE 

in fact 
 I’ve only been fired once 

and I fired ahhhhhhhhh
let me count  

erhharrherhhhh

 guestimating 
quickly 

 maybe 70 folks

thats 
 over my twenty odd years
 as a CEO
of small potatos inc 

my pop always said

“ firing is like fucking 
in a baboon troop
 one huge
 purple ass 
usually 
does the bulk
 of the spearing ”
-------------------------
so what's
mixin
 the cocktail 
here

what's 
  the vicarious
 bit on this show 
 
 decidedly 
the thrill 
ain’t the old
 ffffeeeeeeuuuuwww

“ it ain’t me babe ”

no these jollys
 are
mostly what's
 called the thumbs down
 roar of lusty blood flow 
type jollies

the
“get
 that fucking prick”
jollys 

thatz whatz 
 driving the ratings

  if  not 

if its
 like miss universe
and
 broad slabs
 of lintheads 
out there 
are rootin 
for favorites
to be
 Dondon’s new
java monkee 
then 
 I gotta say

“ some losers
  never win “

 which 
  oughta be
 the real  america’s 
     national anthem 
 by the way 
anyway 
-----------------------------------------


now  you’re warmed up some 
here’s todays real 
 topic

 what if your place
 of  highway jobbery 
was actually run
 by a program 

yes 
a computer program 

Cyber Chief lets say 

what if when 
 you got the axe 
a machine did it 
and whatz more 
a machine 
TOLD THAT MACHINE 
TO DO IT 
AND 
A THIRD MACHINE 
decided all 
fire and hire
guidelines
and 
all 
the sundry  order and sort 
 pro motes
and  de motes too

all 
the bonuses
and 
 penalties 
and sanctions and and and and 

such a set up 

or mock up 
of such a set up 
would sure 
make a good
KANDID FUNTERY
 ==================

 we could  call it 

 turing test company 

place help wanted ads
  nits
come in 
sit in our
shamoo office
  get audio commands 
 from nowhere 
 
no
that stinks 
no 
 there's an HR person 
an actual bleedable person 

why not 
that's staff

make him a her
a hot her 
or hunk him
dependin on the applicant

maybe we 
make the HR 
act very 
 flip 
 mock
 the machine boss

and reassure the prospect 

“ no sweat here man 
old 
“ chuck ” ‘s got 
  no pride 

don’t
 worry fuck
chuck’s
just  a real smart 
coke machine ”


they do 
an interview
and 
 etc etc etc 

say the jobble’s
some thing soft 
ya don’t 
want 
 no tech type slots 

tele marketing say 
or even better
bill collection 
yaaaaaaa

HR shows
room full
of bizzed up 
 phone jockeys 
booth by booth

mentions 
in passing

“ we’re a division of microsoft 
strictly experimental  ”

“ yes we’ll
pay the median performer 
35 dollars per job hour 
that's guaranteed 

no matter what the take 

works out to be....

but outsville is 
 simple too

 drop 20 % below median 
   for two successive months
 or two out of any four  months
 and 
your fired

chucks pretty straight
 about that  ”

then after a days work

have some gruesome 
dress down session
 where chuck
cuts the troops
 one by one
 a new ass hole

ending with a vicious 
“ you’ll never work again
 anywhere ”
 firing 

the workers scream 
back ......

“ its  random 
  the numbers are rigged”

chuck laughs

“ I’m a machine
 I’m a machine 
hard on 
a machine ”

before hand
chuck
in the bubble of privacy
praises the mark of course

and during the asshole cut 
 holds him/her up 
as a gleaming new prospect
“ not like you fucking slugs”
  chuck even 
uses preposterously inflated
performance numbers

cojobbers scream

“ this is a 
 violation 
of all standards
of decency ”


“ of course it is 
spoon head 
I got no heaaaaart ”